I’m not the type to go clubbing. In fact I haven’t been clubbing in years. When I was a lot younger, I really enjoyed it. But there are two many reasons why I’ve left that part of my life behind.
 
One is I don’t drink any more. It’s tough to enjoy a night if dancing and grinding, at least for me, unless I’ve got a little bit of a buzz going on. The other reason is I just can’t stay up that late any more.
 
I honestly can’t remember the last time I was awake later than ten PM. Nine is a stretch. I’ve actually grown to like waking up early in the mornings. Taking long walks before the sun comes up. I can’t really be productive after two or three in the afternoon, so if I want to put in a full day’s work, I need to get started early.
 

 
So when my buddies started talking about this new club that opened up downtown, I just figured it was one of things. I’d listen to them make up stories about how awesome they were with the young ladies, and that would be that.
 
But every Monday, for the last several weeks, they were telling me how awesome it was. And these are geeks. Not players. These are guys that work down in the lab, not up in the sales office. So when they first started talking about going to the club, I just imagined they’d go and wallflower for a while, then go home and jerk off.
 
But these guys started coming in with pictures. Of them actually dancing with girls ten years younger than them. At first I thought it was a fluke. A one off thing. Maybe they got lucky and wandered into the middle of a bachelorette party.
 

 
But they started getting texts. Lots of texts. These guys would show me. I figured since these guys were science geeks, they were playing some joke on me. They’d found a bunch of pictures online and had done some photoshopping, and made it look like these girls were sending them nasty texts.
 
So I asked one of them for something specific. I told him, right then and there, to text his “girl” and have her send a text with her naked while balancing a bottle of shampoo on her head. I figured he’d tell me she was busy, and to come back in an hour.
 
But I watched him send the text, and I watched her send it right back. Naked. With a bottle of shampoo on her head.
 
I asked him how in the hell did he manage to get a girl like that. He said he didn’t know. That it was this club. Something about the place made it super easy for him to pull girls like this.
 

 
Of course, in the interests of science. I just had to go and verify this. Check this out. No way could this be true. So I got myself ready to go on Saturday. I had to stay up a couple hours late on Friday, and then sleep really late on Saturday, just to have a chance. I figured I’d get there around ten, and give it until midnight.
 
So I roll up at 9:30. There’s already a long line. I’m walking up and down the line to see if I know anybody, already having decided to just go home. But the doorman said my buddies from the lab had already set it up for me. Maybe they texted him my picture, because the guy knew who I was, but he didn’t know my name.
 
So anyway, I get into this club about 9:45. Still kind of empty. I’m sitting there, leaning up against the bar, drinking a non-alcoholic beer. And these three girls are eyeing me. These are college age girls. Eyeing me. Now, even back when I was in college, this never happened.
 
So I walked over. Introduce myself. They started talking to me. Didn’t tell me to take a hike, like I’d expected. They even asked me to sit down. And I did. We kept talking, and pretty soon the topic of our conversation turned very flirty, and very overtly sexual.
 

 
Part of me was wondering what in the world was going on. But another part felt like I’d better enjoy it before they realized they were committing some major mistake. I mean, young girls don’t talk to guys like me. It just doesn’t happen.
 
Finally, one of them says this club is boring. They want to go somewhere else. That’s I figure it’s my time to leave. But she said she knows this guy, who has a house in the hills. A big house in the hills. And he’s out of town. And if I want to go there with them. Me. With them.
 
She says when we get there, they can have some more interesting refreshments. I figured that meant they wanted to get high or something. I told them I didn’t drink or do any of that stuff. And they said that was better.
 
Huh?
 
I asked why, and they said when they take these things (they didn’t tell me what they were) they tend to get crazy. And they wanted me to go with them and baby sit them. They said the only rule was I wasn’t allowed to take pictures or movies of anything that happened.
 

 
Other than that, whatever happened, happened.
 
So I calmly said, “Yeah, sure, I’ll drive,” before they changed their mind. We went and got into my car. We drove to this expensive house way up in the hills. And went down into the basement.
 
I don’t know whose house it was, but the basement had been converted into a mini nightclub. Massive sound system. Pure soundproofed walls. We went down, and they lit a bunch of candles. Put on some weird music. But then it got crazy.
 
Like, best night of my life crazy. Funny thing was, I don’t remember taking any kind of substances, but I started to really trip out. I’m pretty sure one of them slipped me something. But by then, I didn’t care.
 

 
Me and three girls. Use your imagination. Whatever you can imagined. It happened. Only when I woke up, they were gone.
 
And the basement had changed somehow. It wasn’t quite what I remembered. When I woke up, there was no sound system. No soundproofed walls. Not even any furniture for that matter. Just concrete.
 
And the stairs leading up to the door ended in a brick wall. There was no door. Only the candles, there were a lot higher up than I remembered.
 
And on the floor, there is this very large pentagram. And it’s very cold.
 
I don’t know how long I’ve been here, but it seems like weeks. Months. I never get tired. I never get hungry. I never get thirsty.
 

 
It’s incredibly boring. Me in this stone room. And the only thing keeping me company is the pentagram.
 
I’m not sure if it’s my imagination or not, but I’m starting to think that it’s communicating to me somehow. Like I can sort of hear these words in my head. Ideas. Sounds.
 

 
I hope it talks to me soon. Because otherwise I’ll be very lonely.
 

 
 
 
 

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